KEEPING IT CLAZZY...

MOAB

2011-10-16T22:20:00.002-04:00

Me, Matt, Dre and Jake took some time with nature in Moab this weekend.

Our campsite might have had some power lines happening that maybe made us think we'd all get electrocuted in our sleep, but it worked.

We took my Jeep off-roading and maybe I killed it, for a lady.

Such a great trip with so many inappropriate jokes about pitching tents. Well done, guys.
Thanks for making one of my last weekends with you BoCo fools so awesome.

10 Years

2011-09-11T04:27:00.001-04:00

Since I've moved from NYC, not being there for 9/11 feels strange.

It's hard to believe it's been 10 yrs already. I remember standing on the streets of lower Manhattan on that balmy Tuesday morning, witnessing what the word "tragedy" really meant.

It was instant realization that things would never be the same.

When I actually allow myself to think about it, all feels pretty recent.

There is no question that that day changed the way I perceive almost every thing in life.

There was a lot of bad I saw that day.

But there was also many glimpses of good. Many reasons to feel grateful.

My heart breaks for the families who still wake up every morning missing their dads, moms, husbands, wives, sisters, brothers. I'm forever thankful for every brave person who gave their lives to keep me, and so many others, safe that day.

The past 10 yrs have been filled with healing, remembering, and growing.

I think if we could take it all back for those we lost, we would.

But since we can't, perhaps we can recognize the glimpses of good left behind by those we lost, and those we were lucky to keep, that have molded our characters and softened our hearts.

Thinking of you today, NYC.

MIDDLE AMURRRRICA & MUSE

2011-08-13T14:42:00.003-04:00

(This one is for you, Alisa. Pretty sure you're the only person who reads this blog anymore, but enjoy.)

Ok. Here's what happened. A few Sundays ago us idiots were all sitting around killing a delicious Sunday dinner when we all starting talking about our obsessions with the band MUSE. Matt's runs especially deep, so clearly he had the most to say. By the end of the night we had found out where MUSE was playing next, purchased tickets, and committed to a 9 hr. drive to Kansas City to see them play (the fact that Girl Talk, OK Go and Grace Potter were also playing didn't hurt, either).

I'd never been to Kansas before so I was all about this adventure. (Although, if this was being told from Matt's perspective, he would have made it clear that NONE of us had EVER even heard of MUSE, so he was the Pioneer of Awesomeness that brought us to this genius idea. False statement but I'm happy to feed his delusions because, let's be honest, that's what friends are for.)

It was a good road trip if you take out the part where we had to restart the trip because I forgot the tickets...and then restart the trip again because we got rear- ended. And then I'm pretty sure we had to restart the trip for some other reason, too, but I quickly realized that the first hour of the drive is basically what the next 8 hrs of the drive would look like. Oh Kansas.

We got in to our hotel in Kansas pretty late Friday night/Sat. morning. Matt thought it was important to use his sleeping bag that night, in the hotel room. Jake thought it was important to spoon. I thought it was important to take a photo of it and post it on the internet to ruin any chance either of them may have at a straight relationship.

Jake is responsible for figuring out that one of the best fried chicken joints in the nation just happened to also be in Kansas City. Reason #2 that it was a good idea to drive to Middle America. Stroud's. Honestly never been anywhere like it. Every stereotype I had about people who frequented fried chicken joints in Middle America was confirmed.

Jake enjoying a delicious Dr. Pepper as a warm-up to his friend chicken...

Fried Chicken and Muse all in one day? Pretty sure those are the two things Matty loves most in life.

Guys. This is a giant bowl of gravy. Apparently Jake likes gravy. But this photo literally makes my intestines twist when I see it.

After eating like we were trying to get on the Biggest Loser we were ready.

The name of this music festival was kind of the best and the worst name I've ever heard...KANROCKSAS. And where else would this clazzy situation be held, except at a Nascar Speedway! It was white trash overload and we were LOVING every minute.

It was also 105 degrees.
About a billion % humidity.
Zero breeze.
And I honestly have never sweat that much or been that disgusting in my entire life. NEVER. Not even when I was Middle-Easterning it up on my study abroads in college.
All I did was drink water and eat shaved ice all day. And apparently when you sweat incessantly you never have to pee, which was a blessing because the things they called toilets were rank.
Ok Go, Grace Potter, and Girl Talk are just a few of the bands we saw that afternoon that blew my mind grapes.

Check out this stallion look...except let's please remember that Kansas is his birth place. So those are his people.

Speaking of Matt's people, I got so excited when I saw a fetus-of-a-girl smoking a joint and wearing this shirt. Mostly because it reminded me of a special song that Matt once wrote (please enjoy video below)...

Ten bucks if you can find the idiot face with the shaved ice in this photo...

Honestly, we were just so hot. So, so hot. Sweating so, so much. So just keep that in mind as you see all the sweaty-sick pictures from here on out.

Josh showed us his stance for letting the sweat drip. Very clazzy, I must say.

Seriously. Girl Talk. The man is a genius. Pure genius. One of the most fun live performances I've ever seen.

Don't mind the nasty sweaty pit in the background...

These are just two idiots we met and loved...

And here it is, folks. The infamous southern dance move that Matt has TM'd...

Me, Dre and Jake. Killin' it with the self portraits.

Matty and I almost had a decent one...until blitzed out Batman photo-bombed. Well done, Batman, well done...

Then MUSE came on and this is the face I saw. I mean, did you ever see a man so happy???

So, so sweaty.

Still so happy...

More Muse...

More happy...

Muse. Hands down the best live performance I've ever been to. Totally worth sweating every fluid in my body out for. Thanks to my friends for making this very special trek to Middle America! I'm not sure I ever need to go back to Kansas except maybe to meet some of Matt's distant relatives. I think that would be well worth the trip back.

Ringing in The Rapture with the Boys from Ireland

2011-05-23T15:46:00.002-04:00

Listen. Here's what happened.

Harold Camping totally got us all excited for the end of the world (aka The Rapture) this past Sat. night.

Then my friend Richard had the money idea of celebrating The Rapture with Bono and the boys. Best last-minute Saturday night decision EVER. We figured if anyone's gonna get sucked up to heaven it would likely be Bono, so our plan was to sew some handles on the back of his coat tails and ride that puppy up.

Richard, me, Mel & Laura. I'm pretty sure this photo was taken at 5:50pm. Nine minutes prior to when Harold told us to be ready.

Laura and Mel, checking their email one more time like the CPB nerds we are, before The Rapture begins.

Richard's Rapture face...

Hey! No end of the world? Ok. Cool. Let's get our Rattle & Hum on, then...

Wait. But seriously. Check out this stage set. Unreal. I feel like these U2 guys really know what they're doing...

Ok - my U2 crush? Hands down The Edge. Was it a bit unnerving that 45 yr old soccer moms were offering to take their pants off for him? Yes, yes it was. But he With or Without You'd his way right into my heart...

Harold Camping might of really blown it on Saturday but we killed it with the boys from Ireland. Thanks for such a fun night, guys!

Tiny Girl Hits the BoCo

2011-05-23T01:07:00.000-04:00

It was a little slice of Heaven having Jess in the Boco for 2 wks...in fact, I'm kind of hoping my parents will let her move back until she gets hitched. Just maybe...

Anyway - we showed her a clazzy time while she was here. Or maybe she showed us. I can never tell.

We showed her nature and gave her a nice, healthy dose of high altitude...

We got her to really better appreciate wildlife...

We Pinterested til we did this...

We dressed up like DKE's and D-Ninjas...

She shanked the shank outta this shank...

She stole my friends...

And we Tim-Tam Slammed our brains out...

So yeah, kind of a dream come true. Jess, come back. Just do it. I dare you.

xoxo,

your sis + all your new BoCo fans.

Exactly.

2011-05-19T00:55:00.000-04:00

Tiny Girl Graduates from Cougartown

2011-04-30T16:16:00.020-04:00

Apparently this is a big year for our little Jessie. Aside from getting engaged she also managed to get a diploma...way to multi-task, Tiny Girl!

The face of a Champion. A Geography Major Champion.

Ebony & Ivory Grandmas...

Jess waving to her adoring fans while I take time to talk to the little people behind her.

And this is what happens when our family tries to take photos together. Never good. Although I do love Tutu's WTF? face in the background.

Oh I love these two. So, so much.

And what would a Cook graduation be without a Luau!?

Jess & Grant...

Aunties and Mom. Amazing ladies unite!

Alright, Tanya Tolman. I'm sorry, but I'm stealing your best friends. Tasi and Leah are my new dreams come true. You and Tai get back to the states and I swear I'll build a compound for you guys and the Youngs and then I'll be the live-in-full-time Nanny. I promise.

And what would this weekend be without my trusty sidekicks??? Nate, T-Pain, Am & Joe. A little bit of heaven on earth.

The last Cook kid has left Provo...I'm banking on BYU bronzing some kind of statue in front of the Wilk in honor of our awesomeness.

The Traveling Troubadors

2011-04-28T23:09:00.011-04:00

So here's the deal. I'm pretty sure God threw me a bone when he gave me these gem stars: Joe, Dave & Amber.

I have to go on a shoot for work for a few weeks?
Poof! There they are to keep me sane. And hang out in my hotel suite.

Amber and I need someone to tell scary stories to?
Dave and Joe are there for us and let us scare them all over their faces (pillows were a smart shield, boys, but you know as well as we do that those pillows didn't offer you any protection from the emotional scarring Am inflicted on you).

I need to head to Provo to celebrate Tiny Girl's graduation?
Boom. They all show up to luau their guts out with us. Even Thomas made a guest appearance.

Thanks, guys. Even though Joe looks like an Italian Magician, I still feel blessed every time you guys show up. It's the gift that keeps on giving - where next?!

For Real This Time...

2011-04-28T22:47:00.004-04:00

Believe it or not, a Cook kid is actually getting married.
My baby sister got engaged yesterday.

Dear Grant - enter this family at your own risk!!! Clearly you haven't been warned, but you'll learn soon enough.

Congrats to you both!! If I had a picture of the two of you fools I'd post it, but I don't, so the phat yellow diamond on my sisters finger will have to do.

$50 to which ever of my brothers can be the next one to bite the dust.

The Taco Diaries

2011-03-03T17:32:00.018-05:00

You know when you have those moments when life feels like it literally couldn't get any better? My February Funk was blessed with such a moment when I went to visit my clazzy ladies, Bek & Amber. It was a weekend filled with tacos, ocean, inappropriateness and making dreams come true.

That's me and Am ordering the most delicious tacos at her fave tiny Mexican place by the beach. Am is part Mexican so it was a very authentic experience -- and her Mexicanness made my guauc and shrimp tacos taste THAT much better. They were the best shrimp tacos I ever did taste, ps.

Oh and remember how much I adore Bek? So so so much. I like to steal Am's coolest friends whenever possible.

Ladies...this is going to be a permanent situation real soon...God will throw us all a bone, I just know it!

We also got to hang with Am's friend, Sean. Such a lovely Brit. Pretty sure he gets a trophy for surviving the day with us. Oh, and I love the ocean. So, so, much.

This is me trying to charm the pants off the Brit (literally) with my wit and intelligence so I could then serve him up to Am. You all know how charming I am, so let's just say it was a huge success.

I mean, is she not the cutest thing ever???

Me stealing Am's cherry. Insert super inappropriate joke here. (Don't worry, I did, and shocked the Brit.)

Hanging out @ Mama & Papa Furst's house was yet another dream come true. High fives all around!

Too much lemonade makes for crazy clazzies...Bek starts doing yoga in the kitchen...

...and Am somehow ends up on the floor. Like this. Overdosed on lemonade and Trix.
Don't worry, I'm pretty sure she's super happy here. And I'm pretty sure she was dreaming of bilingual men.

Oh ladies. Thanks for tacos, ocean and lots of dreams come true. Couldn't adore you idiots more.

Best site ever.

2011-03-02T02:40:00.004-05:00

Paula Deen. She's amazingly clazzy.

Almost as amazing as this site. (click it)

Check it out. I especially love the Falcore cameo. Enjoy.

Believe in yourself.

2011-02-22T13:30:00.001-05:00

Like this guy.

Another clazzy lady in the making...

2011-02-17T15:12:00.001-05:00

Actually. This little lady might out-do all the other clazzies I've posted to this blog in the past.

Don't think less of me. Just laugh.

Clazzy advice from Jenna's Grandma

2011-02-16T15:27:00.003-05:00

I was recently venting to Jenna about a situation involving a member of the opposite sex.

Jenna's response to my venting:
"Well, it's like my grandma used to always say...marry 'em or murder 'em. No in between."

I love Jenna's grandma. A lot.

Noah gets rooted in the Burgh

2011-02-14T13:27:00.006-05:00

I got to spend Super Bowl Sunday with favorite Denverites...The Atkins.

Here's little Noah. I knighted him an official Steelers fan for the Super Bowl...

"Hey Noah, remember how you LOVE to be swaddled in a Terrible Towel?"
His ADHD got the better of him in this pic...

"See you love this! Right, Noah??"
He looks a tiny bit drink on his mom's milk in this one. But I gave him some 7-layer dip to wash it down.

"Yeah Noah! You love your Auntie Jenn, don't you???"
And Noah doesn't look scared AT ALL

My affair with Jimmer continues...

2011-02-13T10:58:00.001-05:00

Another snowy morning...

2011-02-08T12:05:00.004-05:00

So Texas (though I love it), the great state of ridiculousness, completely shut down ALL of last week for consecutive snow days.

They didn't get snow.

They got a dusting of what they said was snow, but really it just looked like someone sprinkled a teaspoon of powdered sugar or blow all over a FEW cars.

But of course, the news reported that they were in a state of CRISIS.

This morning I woke up to 12" of snow - added to the already 2 ft of snow that was on the ground - and it's still blizzarding.

The roads were barely plowed, because mountain people are too tough to do those sorts of things.

It's 4 degrees outside. Literally. Which is higher than it's been the past 2 wks.

And NOTHING is canceled. No state of crisis has been declared.

I'm sitting in my office and life is moving on as if it was a Spring day here in Boulder.

Lessons learned here:
1. Texas cracks me up.
2. I'm really glad I bought a Jeep.
3. I'm ready to move to California.

Clazzy Lady of the Month: Tra-say

2011-01-29T16:08:00.003-05:00

Courtesy of my sister.

Tra-say embodies all things clazzy. I want to sick her on Michelle from the Bachelor.

Jimmer. Yes, please.

2011-01-27T15:19:00.003-05:00

I'm newly obsessed with Jimmer Fredette.

Here are my reasons why, in order of importance:

1. His name is Jimmer.
2. His brother is a rapper.
3. He is from NY
4. He basically never misses a shot.

Jimmer & Jenn. I like it.

Pretty sure this 21-yr old is exactly what I've been holding out for...don't worry about it. We will have 3 sons and name them Atreyu (after the Neverending Story all-star), Cru (Rad Racing, need I say more?) and, Jimmer Jr., of course (because you can never have too many Jimmers).

I kid you not...

2011-01-23T21:37:00.004-05:00

Passed this window in downtown Denver today while hanging with the Atkins for baby Noah's post-blessing bash...

Way to keep it classy, Denver Dog Lovers.

Black & Yellow Love

2011-01-22T13:13:00.012-05:00

Remember how I'm from Pittsburgh?

And remember how I'm always crushing on brown boys? Especially ones in black & gold spandex?

Oh - and remember how I think I'm thuggish ruggish? And how I love boyfriends that make rap videos in the Burgh?

I hope you all worship the right team tomorrow.

I have a problem...

2011-01-17T23:52:00.002-05:00

There is a chance I'm way too invested in this season of The Bachelor.

It's shameful, I know. But it's basically the best thing I have going for me on a Monday night, I'm not gonna lie. It's mindless crack for the brain that apparently I need after saving the world each day with advertising.

But here's the thing. This girl is crazy:

Like maybe the craziest girl on the show ever. Sometimes, when the camera does a tight shot on her face, I see Satan in her eyes. And when she speaks, my TV starts bleeding. Watching her is pure pain. Please make her stop, Brad Womack. Please.

Holy 2011...

2011-01-17T23:34:00.007-05:00

2011 isn't bad so far...besides the fact that I hate winter.

I got to ring the new year in with some of my favorite people...
Cue Big Pun: "Hot tub, poppin' bubbly..."

I got to drink out of 62oz Beaver mugs and have super awkward run-in's with all of Jenna's ex-husbands with her over a lovely lunch in Provo. How awkwardness always finds her I'll never know...but she pulled it off like a the clazzy lady she is.

I got my hair did. Finally I don't look like a hot mess out of eastern europe.

Big Reed had a birthday. He's one more year amazing.

And I'm finally back in the BoCo for a while and get to spend time with these gems...Dani, Ryan and Baby Noah. Love love love.

See how EVENTFUL my life is these days???? Ei ei ei.

Neglected. Here's a quick end-of-2010 recap.

2010-12-28T02:53:00.023-05:00

I've neglected spreading clazziness across this nation for far too long.

So, in case you're super desperate for entertainment, here's a quick recap of the past few months...

OCTOBER
I turned a year awesomer. Good thing I had my all-starz there to ring it in in class...at The Walrus. I'm now an even year in age, so I feel like it will be a good year. The odd years always screw me.

I also headed to Prague for a month for work. Basically, I swallowed a forest. I ate every kind of meat and starch available in the Czech Republic. Hence, Fat Camp needing to commence in January.

NOVEMBER
Hit up Hawaii after Prague, with my fam and besties, Joe & Dave. We surfed, sat on the beach, ate and hatched plans for how we can permanently be in Hawaii. And again, pondered Fat Camp enrollment.

And I spent Thanksgiving with the Wilsteads. Definitely the next best thing to the Cooks :) They are the greatest. And so nice to let me crash their cowboy thanksgiving.

DECEMBER
Maybe my office had an 80's Holiday Party. And maybe we went as an aerobics class. And maybe I realized I really love wearing hot pink spandex.

Me in the 80s, literally:

Me killing it with my aerobics class:

Christmas with the Cookies. If there was ever any question of where my clazzy genes came from, these photos should pretty much answer ANY and ALL of those questions.

Happy Birthday, Jeffy!

2010-10-08T12:15:00.002-04:00

Man I love my little brother, Jeff. He's one of the greatest guys I know. And today's his birfday. And maybe he's celebrating it in the Philippines, because why wouldn't you want to dial up being 29 in a third world country?? :)

Wish we were celebrating our birthdays together, Jeffy! Love you!

More LaLa

2010-10-08T11:44:00.011-04:00

I was in LA for work the past few weeks and am headed off to Europe for another month-long shoot...but here are some more pics of some of my favorite things in LaLa that I got to enjoy for a hot minute when we weren't working...

Sushi. Suhsi. And more sushi.

My cousin Amanda's husband, Matt, made us cookies. He's been dying to make the blog, so this is his big debut! Let's here it for Matt and his clazzy Bev Hillzzz baking skillzzzzz.

Spending time on the beach with my best friend since 6th grade, Mia. She is my sanity!

And the VIP clowns I get to work with...I had to post this because they look really important in this photo. Here's to Prague, boys. Hope we make it out alive...

Breaking in Jess, BoCo-style

2010-10-05T10:40:00.019-04:00

With Jess just getting home from 18 months in the Philippines, we figured what better way to break her back into reality than with me, Joe, Jared and, of course, Marta. It was a Labor Day to remember.

We roamed beautiful Boulder and froze in the Jeep because apparently it gets colder when you drive higher...

Finally...a car Joe's not too tall for...
Joe got krunked out on peach cider....

And then maybe Boulder started burning. We had no idea when we drove up the Canyon to go on a hike that we'd be witnessing the biggest fire Colorado has ever had...it was nuts...

Oh wait, and then remember when we filled up tubes all morning, put on some hot speedos and headed to Boulder Creek to go tubing?? But then there wasn't any water in Boulder Creek? That was totally worth it. Really glad we did that.

Anyway - needless to say I think our little Jessie is back on the real-world saddle (sort of), whether she likes it or not. Welcome home, sista!

Star struck

2010-09-19T05:55:00.000-04:00

Hanging out with two of my most favoritest people in LA...

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Welcome home, the clazziest of them all...

2010-08-26T10:44:00.001-04:00

Jess is home. My world is finally right again! Can't wait to see you in the BoCo next week, sista!

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Some Summer Fun...

2010-08-25T22:24:00.010-04:00

Maybe we dined with the Pope

2010-08-20T00:45:00.001-04:00

Me, Matt and a room full of Popes.

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Nono & Peter got hitched!

2010-08-09T16:30:00.010-04:00

In New York City.

My heart broke into a million pieces that I couldn't be there...but here's a taste.

She was nothing short of stunning.

Congrats, guys. Couldn't adore you both more.

Fish Fry Fridays and God's Green Earth

2010-07-22T00:51:00.015-04:00

Ruh-row. Mama came to town this past weekend and my friends got to experience all the glory that is Andi Cook.

We decided to show her a real classy time by taking her to a ghetto Wisconsin-lovers bar for some Friday Night Fish Fry (apparently it's a midwest thing...I had no idea).

I learned what cheese curds were...delish...unless you eat too many...and then you will for sure crap your pants.

Kate wins clazzy lady of the month for these two money shots...

And bring on the Fish Fry! Walleye, Perch and Catfish. Yeah, this made us crap our pants, too. But I've never seen our dear Glennjamins so happy...I think it was partly due to his sweet plaid shirt, tho.

And don't worry. Maybe my mom worked with some ex-marine named Cotye. For reals. I thought he was being all suave asking her dance until she switched into Mom-mode and started telling him how to dance. He lost interest after that, but took his glory stories of dancing w/ a cougar home with him...

The morning after Fish Fry we of course went for a hike! Andi loved being one with nature...
and I really do live in a postcard...

Mom killed it with her rock climbing...hey-yo!

Mark gets his Boulder on...

2010-07-21T01:22:00.013-04:00

My awesome friend Mark from NYC came to visit a few weeks ago. Not only is he a killer photographer (see his snapshot from his nature hike below) he also has an extremely high tolerance for clazzy ladies, which works out really well for me. And probably why he's one of the few people visiting me... :)

The clazziest ladies in BoCo took him to Red Rocks to listen to some wacked out gypsy music. Don't ask. We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into...but Red Rocks was gorgeous and I'm pretty sure we came up with some epic new dance moves

Then maybe we stopped at a random bar on the side of Hwy 93 next to a nuclear plant or something. It was pretty amazing.

My clazzy ladies of the BoCo...showin' this bar what's up.

Voted the best iPhone photographers in the bar that night...Les is a force of nature with her hipstamatic app.

And don't worry, guys. Mark and I both felt a lot better after we had one of these...

Thanks for coming, Mark! My Jeep wants to know where her professional glamor shots are...

I want to date them ALL...

2010-07-09T02:38:00.002-04:00

Thank goodness I'm single and CAN.
(Special thanks to Jenna for digging this gem up.)

It's Like You Don't Even Know Me

2010-06-29T23:39:00.029-04:00

Seriously. Check it. This was my weekend last weekend...

Me (from Pittsburgh). Les & her rents, Walt & Wendy (hailing from Cleveland). Dani (representin' Detroit). And Glenn (the thunda from Down Unda).
In Vail.
Watching Yo-yo Ma perform...
surrounded by a bunch of rich, white people.
...picnicing on the grass at an amphitheater in the mountains.
You weren't allowed to make a sound at this concert, ps...Maybe the hardest few hours of my life.

But it was GORGEOUS.

Hiking to the amphitheater...

Oh Yo-yo...we love you...
I had to ninja my way in to get a semi-non-blurry photo.

Walt throws one back while Wendy figures out her new camera.

Glenn led the gay pride parade with his picnic basket and Fire Martha's Vineyard get-up...

"What do you mean I'm not manly??"
Yeah...don't worry about it...stawberries, wine and lots of pastels...

Prego Dani! It's a boy! And look at us culturing him while in the womb...
He's getting a head start on Auntie Jenn's Camp Clazzy, fo sho.

We rocked at the Marriott Vail resort for the night...wha wha...amazing views! The slopes were greeeeeeeeeen as could be...

My new favorite dining place...The Little Diner in Lionshead. Marta - we're going...It's awesome. You will order one of everything, of course.

And Yo-yo made front page...

The rest of the time consisted of Dani and I putting out our vibe at the hotel pool...and Dani tempting the pool boy with her pregnant mommy boobs.

You're on a classy overload, right?? I'm just sayin'. We were kind of big time stuff last weekend. Don't worry, I'm back to my trashy self now.

Nono Hits the BoCo

2010-06-09T02:30:00.019-04:00

So Nono finally made it out to the BoCo. This has been a long time coming, and since she's never seen REAL mountains west of the Mississippi, it was kind of a big a deal.

Also a big deal worth mentioning is that she ditched her fiance after less than 24 hrs of being engaged to embark on this mountain adventure...so thanks to Peter for letting her come to Camp Class & Sass in Boulder this past weekend...

We started off by heading to Red Rocks for a concert...Noe was obsessed with the sky. Like she took 4,568 photos of it.

We took some Jeep rides thru the mountains while Matt slept thru church...

And, of course, because we're awesome, we BBQ'd. Again. But this time with Noe's Mimi's secret recipes...DELISH...

Matt was forced to assume the position...once again...

...while we all admired his Casio calculator watch from 1988...

Oh yeah. And maybe we found an Alpaca Farm. Kinda freaky. Kinda amazing. Kinda didn't even think these animals were real until this encounter on Sunday.

Thanks for making the pioneer trek west, Nono! Couldn't love you more.

Lazy Weekend of Awesomeness

2010-06-02T01:27:00.015-04:00

We had a super lazy weekend...and it was awesome.

We took naps...

And jacked-up close-ups of Matt. This photo actually mildly frightens me.

We took awesome Jeep rides thru the mountains...

Tried on leather riding gear in Estes Park...

Grilled the most amazing blackened fish tacos w/ mango salsa and pineapple ever...

Saw a few rainbows...

And maybe laid on the couch after another long day of BBQ'ing...

I wonder if I can repeat this all summer...

Come Partake of Nate's Nectar

2010-05-26T12:41:00.003-04:00

CALLING ALL LADIES...

I have this friend, Nate. He is single.
So I've decided to pimp him out via this blog.
You will all thank me, I promise.

Nate has trademarked what we like to call "Nate's Nectar". Basically, it's his irresistible mojo. You might think you're immune, but I guarantee you are not.

That aside, he is also one of the greatest guys to prowl the streets of Provo.

And he's willing to put his back into it if you're the clazzy lady of his dreams. I'm not kidding here, girls. Not even a little bit. He's awesome. And if you read this blog, YOU'RE awesome. So there should be no hold up. NY, LA, Vegas, Texas, where ever you might be, we'll make this happen.

Let's make you a love connection, let you drink of Nate's Nectar, and make all your eternal dreams come true.

Who's in?

Matt's here. Finally.

2010-05-24T16:14:00.004-04:00

Yea! Welcome to Boulder, M.

Weiners, Guac and Trust Falls. Don't worry about it.

2010-05-19T01:42:00.015-04:00

My co-workers and I decided to BBQ in the pouring rain last week. That's how desperate we are for non-work-related-social gatherings. It was a night to remember...

Viv brought her ridiculously good looking baby, Twyla. We're all obsessed. Here's Leslie practicing her kidnapping skillz...

There was an awesome spread with even awesomer people...

We of course maintained tradition and mandated trust-falls...
Apparently Chuka, Les and Ryan figured out how to do a train of falls...wha?

Les' form is unparalleled...

As is Greg's strength, apparently...(I mean, I wouldn't dare try to catch a Chuka.)

And, of course, it wouldn't be a clazzy gathering at my house unless there was a mildly awkward moment involving wieners...Hot Dog eating contest, that is...
Our contenders: G-unit, Christie, Les, Chuka, Teddykins
Don't worry...there's video...

Let's do it again soon, guys. Maybe when it's not pouring outside. And maybe when Greg's biceps recover from catching Chuka.

This is what happens when you become Parisian...

2010-05-18T20:35:00.003-04:00

You hang up your clazzy for fancy...what???

Les & Dave...just when I think you can't out-class us anymore you go and pull a stunt like this and then take lots of photos for all of us to be jealous. I'm pretty sure Maxo won't want to play with my kids when the day comes...they'll be farting in sandboxes and he'll be speaking French to the girls on the swings.

Mama

2010-05-08T17:42:00.008-04:00

Happy Mother's Day to the most amazing woman I know.
Thanks for praying every morning since I was 3 yrs old that I wouldn't end up in prison.
I love you.
xoxo

The Aussie Meets Bulk Retail

2010-05-08T17:04:00.005-04:00

Les and I took her Australian boyfriend, Glenn, to Costco today for his first visit to bulk retail heaven...

I've never seen a dude so overwhelmed.

We found him rocking a polish hotdog at the concession stand when the going got tough...

But he made it out alive. And I have no doubt he's a changed man.

VIVA AMERICA!

34 Years

2010-05-06T22:28:00.004-04:00

Big Reed & Andi are celebrating 34 yrs of looooooooooooooove.
Here's to another 34! Best. Parents. Ever.

Maybe one day I'll get to make ads as good as this...

2010-05-06T11:48:00.001-04:00

I already own a Shake Weight.
These are next.
And then I'm set for summer.

Happy Birthday, Joe D.

2010-04-26T23:15:00.014-04:00

I got to spend this weekend with one of my dearest homies, Joe. He's one of the most loyal pals a clazzy lady could have.

We ate breakfast in his window sills...

Chilled and listened to prime beats like only we can do...

Go-karted with a guy that looked like the uni-bomber but at least Joe and I looked pretty bad-A in our helmets...

We also rocked Joe's VIP rooftop and hot tub...don't worry about it...

And then I got an original Joe D. Smoothie. It was like a White Demon Love Song in my mouth.

Oh and don't worry, we were all blessed with a VIP cameo by Jared. And then I took him to the moon...I kind of have that effect on men.

Thanks for being born, Joe. And thanks for being such an incredible friend! Couldn't adore you more...let's figure out how to be neighbors again! Happy birthday, friend.

Like Will & Grace But Better.

2010-04-23T01:03:00.021-04:00

Last weekend I got a little slice of heaven when the stars aligned and I got to hang out with all my favorite divas: Jenna, Cory, Richie and the little man Calvin. The roles of Will & Grace were reprised by Rich and myself...Jenna obviously took on Karen and Cory was Rosario (seemed more fitting than Jack). Calvin continued to play the role of Benjamin Button because he was the only adult supervision.

As soon as we landed the Broadbents didn't waste any time getting dirrrrty Mexican-Chinese food into our systems...you know it's good when the restaurant mascot is a rat in a sombrero being hauled by a mule.

Diners, Dives and Drive-Thrus...wha wha!
This bad boy sat in my stomach the entire week. But it was delicious. Jade chicken quesadilla. Changed my life. AMEN.

Cal just watched us all, appalled at our behavior as usual.
But then Calvin found a new bestie in Uncle Rich (who sometimes likes to pretend he's teen-werewolf sensation, Jacob Black, in his cut-off's and shirtless outfits)...

We spent a lot of time at our little Heaven on Earth, Last Chance, while Rosario stayed at home and binged on gold fish...

And then these are just photos that I'm not even going to try and explain. Let's just say my new nickname of SWEET MYSTIQUE could probably apply to these clowns, too...

But maybe in this picture Jenna is checking for lazers.

A bestie reuion never felt so good. Like, it was physically painful to leave them. Thanks for making me laugh til I cried, guys. Let's schedule the Taco Truck Tour ASAP.

Homesick. Again.

2010-04-13T18:23:00.005-04:00

My family is here...

Wishing I was, too. I'm in some pretty major Hawai'i withdrawls.

Bring me back some aloha, guyz. And some ocean.

You Know You've Penetrated Pop Culture When...

2010-03-30T15:41:00.002-04:00

Someecards.com does cards like this:

Needless to say, my team's lovin' it.

Heavy D., Yes Please.

2010-03-28T20:16:00.003-04:00

So we're shooting some more commercials here in LA and the producer we're working with just became my new hero because he produced all the Heavy D, Soul 4 Real, Jodici, etc. videos of the 90's.

Here's a throw-back to the awesomeness he brought us...

Candy coated rainbows. I love it.

Hailey, You Genius

2010-03-23T19:19:00.003-04:00

Hailey did her own March Madness Bracket...

It's basically amazing.

I think if you click on it you can get the full effect.

My Brother Rules

2010-03-18T21:13:00.002-04:00

Tall, dark and handsome...and mowing on a turkey leg at the Rodeo?

Ummm...he's related to me...and he's awesome.

Who Else Seen a Leprechaun say, Yeah-ya

2010-03-17T10:56:00.002-04:00

I want da gold.
I want to know where da gold at.

One of my all-time favorites.
Happy St. Patty's day.

Heard about a party up in NYC

2010-03-15T15:36:00.009-04:00

Thanks, Nono, for turning 30 so I could have a great excuse to come back home to NYC! And even though it was a flash flood all weekend it was still one of the best weekends ever.

I kind of suck and forgot my camera...but thanks to the iphone I have some pics of the weekend, none of which have anything to do with Nono's actual birthday celebration, though. Classic me. Sorry.

It took like 3 minutes before I was yelling at cab drivers again.

It was pouring. This is taken from my cab window while driving across the Brooklyn Bridge...love the view of Dumbo.

Had lunch with the girls...me with the birthday girl and me with Fursty. Two favs. Jules and Tracy made a VIP appearance, too. Loved it.

And of course, Drunk Patti, with a pink martini in hand. Still my favorite Korean ever. Oh how I adore her!

OK - so the weekend was way more eventful...I just don't have proof. But don't worry, I definitely got sick at Nono's birthday dinner with a room full of strangers and was in and out of her bathroom (which in classic NY style is in the middle of her living room) 4 times that evening. Not embarrassing at all.

Thanks to all my homies who I got to see while I was there! Big. Fat. Treat.

I'll be back soon. When the flash flood is over. And Patti's sober.

Seriously So Weird.

2010-03-08T00:49:00.013-05:00

I have definitely had my fair share of "WTF" moments since moving here to Boulder. It's a little different from NYC and I'm still not used to it...

And I had to chalk Saturday up as another one of those moments.

I went to something called Frozen Dead Guy Days. It involved a lot of beer, a frozen dead guy, and coffin races around an obstacle course that Boulderites got REALLY excited about and even dressed up for.

I'm still confused, and it's the most jacked up tradition, but here are a few of my favorite moments/people from the day...

Gettin' their coffin ready for the races...they looked like John Candy in Space Balls:

Hitler in denim cut-offs. Another fav. His whole team was stellar, actually:

Dudes lookin' like ladies...kinda like a worse version of Lucky Changs in NYC:

And then this guy...he went by the name "Pink Sock":

And hearses galore...

Oh, and they also sold deep fried bull balls. With dipping sauce. And a lot of people were eating them. EW.

Mountain people scare me. Gimme back the homeless transvestite on the corner of 15th of 7th any day!!!

Gems from Matty

2010-03-03T13:19:00.004-05:00

Matt is one of my most favorite people in the universe because he sends me stuff like this...

And this...

And my all-time favorite...

Best Dream Ever

2010-03-01T11:34:00.003-05:00

Maybe my subconscious is still living in last weekend because Steve was here and he's besties with Ryan Gosling...and apparently I internalized that because this was the dream I had last night...

Ryan Gosling and I were best friends. We went and had sushi at one of my favorite sushi places in Tribeca in NYC. (Yes, of course I was living back in NYC in my dream.)

Then we went to a hip hop dance class in Soho. Strangely enough I had better moves than Ryan, so I had to teach him a few steps so he could keep up. We then went shopping - he has really good taste even though I think he was in the same t-shirt and jeans the entire dream.

Then he agreed to have his band, Dead Man's Bones (who I love), play at Red Rocks here in Colorado. So we brought the party to BoCo and my co-workers embarrassed themselves because they are mildly obsessed with Ryan. I had to hide Ryan out at our favorite dive bar in downtown BoCo called the Walrus until his concert.

Next thing I knew all my favorite people from SLC, NYC, D.C., Richmond, LA, Hawaii, Paris, Texas and PHX were all at Red Rocks and we watched my best friend Ryan Gosling play the most amazing music in the most amazing venue ever.

Then I woke up, craving sushi and feeling the need to bust a move to some hip hop.

Thank-you to my subconscious for one of the best nights of my life.

BFF Bling

2010-03-01T11:23:00.004-05:00

Some best friends have lockets. Or rings. Or bracelets.

But maybe Jenna and I have matching Micheal Korrs gold watches. It's how we roll.

I'm really grateful for great friends who can justify gold watch purchases.

My other half hits Boulder

2010-02-25T00:10:00.015-05:00

And maybe Jenna came to Boulder this past weekend...and maybe it was one of the best weekends of my life (per the usual when we're together)...why do you have to live in PHX? Seriously. It's gross there.

Ok. Here it is. Our WEEKEND RECAP (until Jenna writes a funnier one that I later post here):

10 lbs of chocolate-covered cinnamon bears. The only candy I would literally drive to a remote town to get.
Washing down bad black and white German movies with Bad Blake's biscuits. (And also learning that tying your kid's hands to the bed is apparently ok for punishing certain behaviors in Deustchland.)

Getting hit on by 23 yr olds who were dumb enough to think we were 25. Bless them.

Pigtails and the Sunday-afternoon-movie-disruptor.

Realizing that Dr. Steve (aka Ryan Gosling's best friend -- don't worry, that's the only way he lets us introduce him) was actually totally ashamed to be hitting the town with us for a night out in BoCo. I can't imagine why...

...Oh wait. Yes, I can. And her name is "One really drunk Leslie" who I think holds the record for best lunger in all of BoCo.

Beating Ryan Gosling's best friend at Skee-ball. Repeatedly. My form is ridiculously awesome.

Friends that make life good no matter how many fish flakes are in your toilet bowl.

Oh. And bacon-wrapped dates. Can't forget those.

Thanks for the coming, Jenna. I'm already in withdrawls.
Thanks for entertaining us ALL, Les.
And thanks for turning blue, Steve.
I love you guys.

A Little Slice of Heaven

2010-02-18T01:56:00.036-05:00

What is it called when you get to hang out with people you adore, have the most fun time ever and you don't have to be bugged by your cell or the world wide web? HEAVEN, that's what. And I gotta little taste of it at the Wilstead Cabin last weekend.

Jared, Clay (aka the Beav), Tanea and myself had the greatest weekend cabin getaway ever...

Maybe Clay and I gave Jared a puppet Beaver for Valentine's Day...he didn't give us the response of glee we were looking for but I'm pretty sure he was really really excited...

Jared finally took me ice fishing! It was my first time walking out on a huge frozen lake...I loved it.

We helped Jar drill a hole in the 18" ice. Maybe the coolest thing I've ever done. I heart ice drills.

Jar baitin' my rod. I think he baited it with a Twinkie or something because I caught NOTHING.

Ok...Ladies...listen up. Please meet THE BEAV.
He's pretty much amazing and let the bidding begin because he's single and ready to warm you up with his stylish Beaver jacket...oh, and he might just be one of the most darling boys I've ever met in my life. I mean, just check out his perfect form in ice fishing...the athleticism is overwhelming...

(Don't worry, ladies. More of The Beav to come later.)

Gettin' our ice fishin' on...Mizz T. How I adore you.

Jar...still baitin' everyone's rods. He's like a Scout Master, except I think he got kicked out of Boy Scouts.
BFFs...

And here is my mountain man in his FULL get-up. Seriously. He is all bizness...camo, goggles, binoculars, a pistol with a holster...Why do I think this photo probably makes G-pa Bergner smile? (Now, Jar, if you could only learn to drive your truck without having to put it in 4WD...)

Four-wheeling thru Antimony...beautiful! I'm officially obsessed with this town.

T-pain and The Beav...a match made in heaven. I'm just sayin'.

Sometimes Jared does things that make us all think "WTF". This was one of them.

And then there was sledding. Beav helps me get ready to get my butt dragged.

We had the genius idea to tie the sled to the back of the Rhino (which I've now decided I want one of those, too).

Jar decided to cramp my style and go tandem...please note his cowboy boots wrapped into my lap. Super Clazzy.

And, ladies, I told you there would be more Beav to come...here is Beav in all his glory, tearing it UP on the sled. Two words: TURN. ON.

Jared. The perpetual show-off :)

Tanea. Killin' it.

And because experiencing the real deal is always better...enjoy.

We also made sure to pay homage to Jared's favorite store on our way out...

It really was a weekend worth dreaming about. Sledding, 4-wheeling, shooting guns, fishing, Jar's cooking, watching bad scary movies, sleeping, country music education, pulling drunk guys named Jeremy's Jeeps out of the snow at 2am, and the occasional bizness calls to Boulder from a pay phone at the gas station.

Jar, Beav, T...Love you guys. Thanks again. Now bring the party to Boulder already.

The Stanley Hotel...Get Yo Creep On

2010-02-08T13:45:00.013-05:00

Ok. So I've been dying to check out the Stanley Hotel in Estes Park here -- not far from BoCo. Mostly because its known for being where King wrote "The Shining" -- and supposedly is haunted like crazy.

Me, Noe and Trajan braved it and got our creep on...it's super old and pretty rad. I think the ghosts were mad that we weren't more reverent.

My roommate really likes me...maybe a little too much?
I need this porch. I wonder if they take renters at the Stanley.

We also cruised around Estes and went to all the wack-job shops on Main Street...they have something for everyone apparently...

Trajan found a goat to ride...hmmmm....

I found something that resembled American Idol winner Ruben Studdard and decided it was necessary to sit on it's lap. I don't know. Looking back, I'm pretty sure I regret this pose.

And Noe opted to put a stuffed Tatonka on her head while she browsed the shop.

Don't worry...this is just me hanging out with lots of creepy stuffed animals.

And this is the sign that was in this taxidermy shop...I would stuff my child, too, if he looked like this...yikes.

Oh...and the WEIRDEST thing...I totally ran into P.Diddy while there. We hadn't seen each other in AGES so it was so great to catch up. I always feel a lot cooler when I'm with Diddy. Can't be helped.

Come to the BoCo and let's get a room at the Stanley and REALLY brave it! Any takers?

Obsessed

2010-01-18T14:23:00.004-05:00

I'm kind of obsessed with my friend Tanya's girls. They live in Malaysia so I never get to see them...but I seriously can't stop checking her blog because I've never seen such good baby-makin' results! Note to self: Samoan, Maori, white mix = MOST GORGEOUS BABIES EVER.

Enjoy. I need to put these babies in some commercials.

Pants on the Ground

2010-01-15T20:09:00.002-05:00

Let's hear it for Matt and his clazzy contribution to my blog today...

I'm kind of obsessed. Excellent find, Matty.

Utah

2010-01-09T21:06:00.002-05:00

P.S. My brother Joe, our friend Megan and I also went up to Utah over the holidays to go snowboarding and hang with some friends...I apparently didn't really take any photos with all my besties that I got to see...but here are a few random ones...

We drove from TX to Utah...here's beautiful Moab. Thanks, iphone!

Me getting ready for first day of boarding...

Me going to the ER on first day of boarding...of course...
We learned that Emaly's kid, Will, can apparently poop upwards instead of downwards. I made Joey hold his shirt up so we could get this shot...

Jared has gone complete Grizz Adams with his facial hair...

And Dave really zinged up our New Years...

Hope your 2kx is going good!

I need to work for Ellen

2010-01-09T21:04:00.000-05:00

Because we both love the same things...

Ho Ho Ho

2010-01-03T22:06:00.026-05:00

It's been a nutty holiday season...I feel like I've been working so much that the past few months have been a blur. I woke up one day and apparently it was Christmas already.

Before leaving Boulder, however, I made sure my coworkers got really souped up to forget how much we make them work...of course I was a sober-sally but we kept it clazzy with a night of trust falls and singing sorority songs.

Then it was off to the state of bigger-is-better to see the fam...still no spouses, still no grandchildren...but we get to sleep in til 11am on Christmas day and Reed & Andi still shower us with gifts...so I'm thinking its not that bad of a deal.

Christmas Eve was our traditional outing for Chinese food...and we had Jessica #2 with us this year (YEAH!!!!) who is a real Chinese person so that made the eve all the more special... And we finally knew when the waitresses were talking smack about us in Chinese.

And then we got to talk to our tiny girl in the Philippines! It was the best present of all! She is doing so good even though toilet paper doesn't exist where she is.

Big Reed tried looking up the chimney for Santa...thank goodness I got this flattering photo of him so I could post it for all the world to see...(don't complain, Dad, I have much worse things I could have posted)

But Santa must of heard Reed's call of the wild because he showed up.
Me and Santa on a love sac. (Who gets to type that sentence?? ME!)

Jeffy brought the hair on Christmas morning, as always...

Clazzy gift giving at it's finest...

Tutu got an iTouch and she didn't speak to us the rest of the day because she was too busy playing Word Warp...

And you'd never guess we are a house full of adults...I mean, seriously...
Hope you all had a very merry Christmas!

CP+B Holiday Party '09

2009-12-22T13:58:00.009-05:00

My agency holiday party...it brought clazzy to a whole new level.
Costumes were required.
The theme was The Arts: TV, movies, literature, music, etc...
And it was insane.

Just a taste...the rest I can't reveal at the expense of losing friends.

Les, Kate and I were mimes...sort of...

The cast of Glee...Rachel, Quinn the prego cheerleader, and the one and only, Sue Sylvester...

And that's how Sue...C's it.
Me and Willie Nelson, don't worry about it...

Alex was the Mad Hatter ala Johnny Depp style...pretty much amazing...

And when Sue Sylvester found Elton John, the night hit it's peak...

The rest I'm saving as blackmail when these guys slack on the job.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS

2009-12-22T11:08:00.003-05:00

I don't do cards. But these guys do.

Party in the USA

2009-12-19T01:19:00.008-05:00

Joe, Dave, Nici and Lyndee made the trek to Boulder last weekend and it just made everything feel better.

We ate, lounged, tried on hats, ate some more, listened to Miley Cyrus' one song that doesn't make me poke my eyes out, shopped, napped...you know, the usual for us...HUGE treat to have them here!

Dave is still bitter about his spinach pancake. Lesson learned: always order crepes w/ nutella. You can't go wrong.

Love a man who's not afraid to wear pink...

"Man, I just have so many brilliant thoughts going on under this bear cap, I can't even open my eyes. It's...so hard...to be...so...genius."

"If Dave can pull this off I can, too..."

You know you've moved to Colorado when....

Love you, guys. Thanks for bringing yo class to the BoCo.

A little late...But still THANKFUL

2009-12-19T01:02:00.007-05:00

I'm a late, as usual. But figured I'd give my shout outs from Thanksgiving before it was actually Christmas...

I went home to Texas and had a great relaxing weekend with Grams, my brothers, the rents, Uncle Scott & Aunty Gail...and of course...my fave cuz...E-DAWG. We were just missin' our Tiny Girl (aka Jessie)!

Anyway...here are a few things I was thankful for this year:

My Grams. She looked awesome. Her wig is awesome. And she is still here. What a blessing.

Ear Candling. Joe introduced us to this after turkey leftovers on Friday. YUM. Its crazy but now we're all hooked. We're so normal...

The great state of Texas. For a few reasons: 1) they have people named Sharonda. 2) they have people named Sharonda that make cakes of "sweet love". 3) they have people named Sharonda who put giant magnets like this on their car for people like me to take photos of in the Target parking lot...

My really adorable parents who remind every day that a co-pilot is worth looking for...

Mixing work and pleasure?

2009-12-16T19:22:00.003-05:00

This is the kind of stuff I get emailed to me from our team who is working on prepping for a photoshoot...

Real nice. Super classy. I don't think going to second base with a mannequin counts for anything, ps.

D.C. Favorites

2009-12-10T19:58:00.005-05:00

Life has kinda sucked lately. So I keep putting fake lights at the end of my tunnel...last weekend was a really, really good one...

Marta...

Sarah & Justin...

and Matt...

I mean...it was like Celestial Kingdom come early.

Thanks for the amazing pizza...throw backs like Charlie the Unicorn & Bubs Bubs...and for the most delicious cupcakes ever. Our Nation's Capital never felt so good.

xoxo

Never Too Much

2009-12-02T17:29:00.014-05:00

Just when you think "how can anyone rival with The Jenna?"...Hailey comes flying in like an explosive strapped to an abnormally large energy drink...

These two ladies showed me how to bring shame to my family and teen-warewolf-vampire-lust levels to an all-time high...

So first order of bitnezz was to make fan tees (after Jenna and I ate In-and-Out, of course).

Jenna opted for the Team Charlie route...mostly because she likes to advertising trashy beer and mustaches:

Hailey breathed new life into a classic:

And I immortalized my friends (see my previous post for before and afters). I feel like they should thank me:

Drum roll please...the tween freaks and their moms have nothin' on us.

We had to go pick up some treats for the movie...Jenna of course stocked up on Whey Up! drinks and I found a little snack to take into the theatre to make sure all the Twilight fans knew I meant business:

This is right before we heard the 13 yr old girl behind us making inappropriate groans when 16 yr old warewolves showed off their six packs:

We managed to keep our pants on and control any LB's...but seriously. These clazzy ladies are like oxygen for a dame like me. Why they don't live in Boulder is a mystery...but Eclipse is coming in June, so I think we should invite our Queen Twlight Bee, Miss Amber 1st, and blow Boulder's mind. I'm just sayin'.

And, Jenna, maybe I just love you because you do stuff like this while looking at Dr. Rick Thibault's website:

Thanks for rocking my world, ladies. I really do just love you both. Almost as much as I love teenage vampires.

No Shame

2009-11-23T20:59:00.007-05:00

New Moon is out.
As I'm sure you all know.

There were a few of my friends who I wished could have made it to the movie with us...

...So I made this image and ironed it on to my Fan Tee that I wore to the movie:

I mean...is it a coincidence that 3 of my best friends are Native American, Black and Anglo-saxon?? I think not.

Yep. No shame. Don't even worry about it. More shamefulness on this evening to come...

Kind of the Best Week Ever

2009-11-16T14:07:00.009-05:00

I'm totally behind on keeping all 3 people that read my blog up to date on all my super VIP adventures (which are NOT super VIP nor do they really meet any requirements of "adventures")...

But I did get to spend the best week ever with my grams recently. She's in the middle of some wicked chemo and I was lucky enough to get her all to myself for a whole week!

Since I was the new Sheriff/care-taker in town and Grams has felt so cooped up, we decided to break some rules...kind of what I do best. So going to get ice-cream whenever we wanted it, and letting Grams loose on a jazzy chair in the grocery store were a few highlights...

Sitting in chemo is actually super long. And boring. Grams is such a good sport about it, though! I was the antsy one, freaking out about how many bags of drugs they were pumping into her little body! She just chilled and played my iphone til it died...and then rocked a nap...

We got her all dolled up and met mom for lunch...

It was kind of the best time ever. I'm lucky to have such a clazzy, strong lady like Grams in my life. Grams - I miss eating all our meals together...

See you soon.

Shout Out

2009-11-02T18:07:00.003-05:00

One for me. And one for my homies. In NEW YORK...

Miss you guys! Give Lady Lib a kiss for me.

Halloween in the Texmex

2009-11-01T23:28:00.028-05:00

For Halloween I went home to Texas...my little brother, Jeff, and I took a roadtrip to San Antonio where our other brother, Joe, is going to dental school. Joe and his roommates are notorious for their parties so I figured I should make it out to one at least once in my life. Clay and the Johnsen crew joined us...it was memory-makin' time to say the least...

We stopped at Buc-ee's...maybe the best truck stop I've ever been to in my life. Seriously. Any place that makes a name for themselves via their Beaver mascot is kind of amazing and deserves my patronage.

And this is Clay while we were filling up our gas at Buc-ee's. I've stopped trying to make explanations for him. He's just everyone's favorite spaz.

We got to San Antonio and Jeffy was the DJ for the evening and threw down some amazing beats for us all night...DJ JiggyJeffreyG...halla.

And here are Joe and his roommates...the hosts w/ the mosts...

Joe was a Woopie Cushion...obviously. He did some warm ups for me while we were getting ready. It was good work.

I was Tina Turner. But I felt like I was 50 yrs old b/c half the people at the party were like "who's tina turner?" I wanted to slap them. Who asks that question, seriously?

Megan was Bon Qui Qui...which was brilliant.

"Don't interrupt...rude. Sucurrrrity!"

And Clay was a pimp. Of course. He was feeling pretty good about himself this night.

Until I got phenomenally grossed out by his man-cleave. Seriously. I wanted to puke on his b-cups. But he was kind of proud of it -- almost as proud as he is of his gold watch.

But thank goodness Lederhosen Pat graced us with his presence. I've been waiting years to meet this kid, who is the yin to Joe's yang. He was everything I dreamed and more...

He was even willing to hike up his lederhosen when I asked him to make them hot pants for me...

See...yin & yang.

The party went all night long...just like Lionel Richie said.
It was complete w/ black lights, strobe lights, fog machines, give-away prizes, dance-offs, etc. It was all biznazz with these dudes.

Joe & Amanda...so cute...

Again - no idea. We just let him do his thang.
But then I did my thang (the wig got dumped by 2am. I can't live up to Tina)...and Clay watched in wonderment...

As we were winding down Joe ditched the Woopie and decided that his tights were the better outfit option for clean-up... NO SHAME, baby...

Thanks to the boys in San Antonio for a great party! And thanks to JiggyJeffreyG for droppin' a hot beat and giving me the gift of BUC-EEs. My brothers rule.

Get ready...

2009-10-28T18:22:00.007-04:00

Because maybe I'm going to PHX in a few weeks to watch a certain vampire movie premier with a certain clazzy lady named Jenna. We are going to drown ourselves in diet coke and annoying pre-pubescent teen girls and lady boys.

Jenna, here's to life-size cardboard cut-outs of Rob Pattinson in your kitchen and sometimes your bed...
Can't wait.

Homesick

2009-10-28T03:06:00.007-04:00

I get homesick for 2 places: Hawaii and NYC.

I was just checking out some photos my friend Mark took...so today it's NYC...

Costumes

2009-10-27T11:24:00.003-04:00

My brother Jeff and I are attending our brother, Joe's, annual out-of-control Halloween bash in San Antonio this year.

But we need costumes. I was thinking we could be Bobby Light and Black Lavendar:

He would have to wear purple, though. Not sure how he feels about that.

Joey & Flipper...Friends Forever

2009-10-26T17:10:00.008-04:00

So my friend showed me a youtube clip today that triggered one of my favorite memories of growing up with my brothers...

Background:
We were living in Australia at the time. I think I was 4, because Joe (my little brother) was about 3. And Justin (my older brother) was probably 6. At this point in his life, Joey had an unhealthy love for Flipper the Dolphin. Joey also wore correctional shoes b/c his little feet turned in.

We all kind of looked like this...Jus' head looks really big here. And Joe (the brown kid front and center) looks like he pretty much always does:

The Story:
My parents had just drained our swimming pool for cleaning.

Justin: Hey Joe! Flipper is in the pool! Flipper is in the pool! Hurry!
Joe runs at full speed out of the house and takes a nose dive into the empty pool and shatters his nose.
The End.

I think Justin got grounded for a long time, and I know its messed up, but man this story makes me laugh. Really hard. Mostly because who nose dives into an empty pool? Sweet gullible Joey, that's who.

So here's the youtube clip in honor of Joey and his friend Flipper:

A post-birthday Tongan surprise

2009-10-20T21:50:00.024-04:00

Richie. I can't quite seem to escape him.

He came to Boulder this weekend as a belated birthday present. And maybe we had the greatest time...

We had the best weather so we decided to hit up Estes Park and all it's amazingness...

We stopped at this place on the way...I think I spent $75 on all sorts of cherry crap. But it was delish.

But here's the stuff we found in Estes that blew our minds...
A sunken in house. We are still confused as to how this all came to be:

Amazing window displays:

Great holiday gift ideas:

A new friend for Richie. A beaver...how ironic:

Belt buckles galore at the biker store...don't worry, we both purchsed killer best friend buckles with elk on them:

And then maybe I was also reminded of what it's like to hang out with Richie...because I catch him doing things like this:

We also went for a hike...he was like Kanye in the mountains...such a ham.

It was also convenient that it was Bring Your Tongan Best Friend to Work Day...so Richie got to check out the ad agency that's better than his (ZING!)...
I showed him how we make the magic happen. On small trikes.

And the I showed him the art of drinking and riding...

Thanks for bringing your royal brownness to Boulder, Rich. Maybe one of the greatest birthday treats ever!

My gut still hurts from laughing. Such a good feeling.

Getting older in Boulder...

2009-10-11T22:52:00.012-04:00

So maybe I had a birthday this weekend. And here's my top 4 best things that happened this weekend:

1. My bestie, Em, sent me a SHAKE WEIGHT in the mail. This gem has been the butt of many jokes in my office for a while now. And when we let the real thing loose in the halls of my agency, it was game over. Watch closely - Leslie gives a stellar performance, and we learn that pregnant creative directors that look like Margret Cho can do the shake weight, too:

2. Joe, Dave and Nici conspired with my office mates to surprise me by driving out to Boulder from SLC for my big day...

But thanks to the freak-early snow storm we got this weekend they got stuck on a closed down highway in Wyoming. I mean, could you ask for greater friends?? I felt so bad that they never made it here, but that was the greatest gesture o' love I've ever received!

3. Down and durrrrty Mexican with some of the best people I know...(let's here it for Ryan and Dani moving to Colorado! I'm starting a trend...who's next??)

Maybe Dani's margarita was called "man berries". No joke.

Don't worry, mine was virgin...

Ryan, double-fisting it.

And don't mind the d-bag in the window killing our group glamor shot...

4. And to top it all off, little Max sent me this photo of himself in his "never-nude" shorts, dressed up like Tobias from Arrested Development...good to see the Parisians love good ol' fashioned American humor...and denim cut-offs...(his man boobs rock)

Thanks for a great birthday! And here's to hopefully not having to freeze my eggs one day!

Missing my family...

2009-10-11T22:47:00.001-04:00

And here's just one example why:

You're not in NYC anymore...

2009-10-07T00:44:00.030-04:00

Dear Rock Mountain National Park,

It's Fall...and you were looking pretty amazing. Thanks for showing us a good time this weekend...except for maybe the part where we got really lost in 14,000 ft altitude and it was blizzarding and we were driving on cliffs, and it took us twice as long to get back home. Other than that it was pure bliss.

Kel, Noelle and I really dug the Elk. Way to go for keeping those guys around.

Also, thanks to your altitude, our glamor shots got increasingly clazzy. Pretty good chance they don't paint any of us ladies in a good light, so I have no choice but to post them for the world (ie the 3 people that read this blog) to see.

You definitely showed these three city girls who's boss, I'm not gonna lie...

Getting our Elk Festival on at Estes Park...

My first Elk sighting. Big moment. So big we tried to reinact it.

I heart fall.

"Hey look! We're mountains!" WTF?

Wad up, Rockies?

This is the pimp elk:

And these are his harlots:

The higher the altitude got, the clazzier we got...

Apparently this is what God calls "tundra"...

Phallic? Naaaah.

Hey Rockies, we got you all sorts of figured out...

xoxo,
jenn

My 'Lil Fatty

2009-09-29T00:05:00.014-04:00

So one of my besties, Emaly, came to visit me recently and she brought her beautiful little baby boy, Will...

He's a chub. I was OBSESSED. Kankles, bloated feet, rubberband arms, you name it.

Ugh. Yum.

Super Jenn @ 4am

2009-09-18T21:56:00.004-04:00

This week has been a doozy. My team and I have been pulling 22 hr days for 4 days in a row. We are delirious right now, to say the least.

This is what happened at about 4am this morning while we were waiting for files to download...

I found a trike. And a cape. And it was game over.

You kind of have to make your own fun when you get to this point...shoot me.

Miracles...

2009-09-17T23:22:00.007-04:00

...I feel like I never get them. But I got one today:

Last Friday my family was told that my Grams had a few weeks to live. Compliments of cancer. Unexpected to say the least...especially to her. She's the healthiest person in the world...and young. I spent the weekend with Grams and my family and it was some of the best time ever spent...it was lots of those kinds of moments where there is just no where else in the universe you'd rather be.

After a lot of prayers and faith, we got encouraging news today that we might be able to do some treatment to keep Grams around longer.

Miracles do happen. Thank goodness, because I'm not ready to let her go.

I love you, Grams. Let's kick this chemo in the crotch and take a trip home to Hawaii ASAP!

Take a Hike

2009-09-17T14:54:00.003-04:00

I really need to get out of the office more.
But when I do...it's not that bad...
Never thought I'd hike much, but this blasted town is too pretty not to!